Two guys are getting really drunk at a bar…

…and one of them proceeds to vomit all over his own shirt.

He says to his friend, “Aww man. My wife is going to kill me. She’s going to be so pissed that I got so drunk tonight.”

His friend says, “Don’t worry I have a plan .”

He tucks a $20 bill in the man’s shirt pocket and says, “Just tell your wife that it wasn’t your fault, and it was some other guy who puked on you, but was nice enough to give you 20 bucks for your cleaning bill.”

So the puke-covered fellows stumbles home and in the process wakes his wife who as predicted is incensed at the deplorable state of her husband at this late hour.

He states, “Honey it wasn’t me. There was a guy at the bar who puked all over me and gave me a 20 to get the shirt cleaned up. Just look in the pocket and you’ll find the money.”

She checks his pocket and finds two twenty dollar bills there and asks, “Where the hell did the second bill come from then?”

He smiles at her and replies, “That’s from the other guy who pooped in my pants.”

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