This is a story of a smartass parrot.

This young lady walks into a pet store to buy a parrot. The guy behind the counter says that he only has one and that it’s a real “smart-ass” with a vulgar vocabulary and rude temperament.

The woman says, “That’s okay, I know how to handle smartasses like that. I want the parrot anyhow.” So the woman gets the bird home, puts it in her room, and starts to get ready for bed. Just as she gets her slacks off the parrot says: “Awk . . . nice legs, baby!”

Well, the woman isn’t gonna take such abuse, so she takes the bird out of the cage and puts it in the freezer for three minutes. While the parrot’s in the freezer, he becomes real sure that this was the wrong thing to say, and is making a large mental note about saying that again.

The next night, again the woman is getting ready for bed. This time the parrot knows not to say anything about her legs, but after she removes her blouse, and then her bra, the parrot just can’t resist any longer. He blurts out, “Awk . . . great tits, baby, let’s see ya shake um.”

Once again the woman gets upset and she decides that instead of three minutes in the freezer, she is going to keep the parrot in for five minutes. This time the parrot has lots of time to think. Remorse gives way to desperation, and finally to anger.

Finally, the woman opens the freezer door, takes out the near frozen parrot and says, “Well, have you learned your lesson?” The parrot, still shivering and barely able to speak, says, “Awk, yea, yea, sure, sure, but I have just one question.” The woman says, “Yes?” The parrot says, “Awk . . . what did the turkey do, ask for a blow job?”

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