The Voodoo Dildo

A man is about to go abroad on a business trip, but he is worried about his wife cheating on her because she is has strong sexual cravings and has been known to be promiscuous in the past.

The man decides to go to an adult store to find her a sex toy to satiate her desires, and finds himself in an old shop run by a Chinese fellow. He explains his problem and the owner tells him he knows exactly what he needs. He brings out a wooden box with some strange engravings on it and explains to the man it is a voodoo dildo. Looking confused the man asks what in the heck a voodoo dildo is. He tells him to just watch and then says,

“Voodoo dildo, the door.”

The dildo flies out of the box and begins to vigorously pound the door knob, causing the door to crack a little. The man, impressed, tells the owner he’ll pay whatever the price is for it. The owner then says,

“Voodoo dildo, the box,”

and it flies back in the box and the man purchases it.

He goes back home and explains to his wife that whenever she misses him to simply open the box and say,

“Voodoo dildo, my pussy,”

and leaves her the box.

He goes on his trip and the wife starts to miss him, and she decides to try it out. She opens the box and says,

“Voodoo dildo, my pussy,”

And just like he said it starts to work it’s magic. After about 3 orgasms in she realizes she doesn’t know how to make it stop! She quickly gets in her car and starts to drive to the hospital as she is being pounded by the voodoo dildo. She has another orgasm and swerves quite a lot, when a cop notices and pulls her over. As soon as he gets to the window she starts to try and explain the voodoo dildo in between exasperated breaths to the cop. The cop replies,

“Voodoo dildo my ass!!”

submitted by /u/OverlordGhs
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