The Queen of England Was on a Tour…

…at one of America’s finest hospitals when she passed a ward and spotted a male patient stroking the salami.

“My word, if that isn’t the repulsive thing I’ve ever seen!” she gasped.

“I’m terribly sorry, Your Majesty,” the doctor leading the tour said, “this patient has a serious condition where his testicles replenish semen very rapidly. If he doesn’t do that sex times daily, his epididymis would explode and it could mean instant death.”

“The poor man,” the queen remarked. On the next floor, another man was going hard at it with a young petite nurse.

“Oh my,” she goes again, “what is happening here?”

“Same problem, ma’am. Just better healthcare plan.”

submitted by /u/onomatopoetix
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