The FBI assassin joke, with the added joke from the comments!

The FBI had an opening for an assassin. After all the background checks, interviews and testing were done, there were 3 finalists. For the final test, the FBI agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun. ‘We must know that you will follow your instructions no matter what the circumstances.’

Inside the room you will find your wife sitting in a chair . . . Kill her and make it look like it was not an assassination!!’ The man said, ‘You can’t be serious. I could never shoot my wife.’ The agent said, ‘Then you’re not the right man for this job. Take your wife and go home.’

The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about 5 minutes. The man came out with tears in his eyes, ‘I tried, but I can’t kill my wife.’ The agent said, ‘You don’t have what it takes. Take your wife home.’

Finally, the last man was given the same instructions, to kill his wife. He took the gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the man, wiping the sweat from his brow and zipping up his pants. ‘Some idiot loaded the gun with blanks’ he said. ‘I had to strangle the bitch to death, I then had sex with her body to make it look like it was a rape, I bet we can blame it on that Mexican nacho vendor outside. ” he laughed.

The took agents looked at each other in absolute horror.

“Oh my G..! Sir! You are way way to sadistic, violent and racist…even for us. Just leave now!”

The man left the building in absolute anger, knocking out the girl at the reception when she tried to say goodbye to him.

Just as he was leaving the building a guy in a suit and pitch black sunglasses approached.

“I heard about your little stunt in there. I think I might have the job for you…have you ever heard of United Airlines?”

submitted by /u/Lemonlaksen
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