The Assassin

Two men had a tee time, and were about to get started when a man approached them, said he was alone and asked if he could join them. The two men agreed.

Making small talk, the subject of their professions came up. After the first two described their boring desk jobs, the third man said “I’m a killer for hire. I’m one of the best in the business, I charge $10,000 a shot.”

The first two men looked incredulous, so the third man reached into his golf bag, and produced a sniper rifle, and watched the mens’ jaws drop. “This thing has incredible range, I can aim from miles away.”

One of the men asked “Wow, my house is pretty close by, I wonder if I can see it from here.” The assassin hands him the gun, and he holds it up in the direction of his house. His lip curls and his face turns red as he witnesses through the scope his wife in their bedroom with his next-door neighbor.

“I can’t believe that cheating whore and my double crossing bastard neighbor”

“Well… I am an assassin…”

“Alright, I want you to shoot my neighbor in the dick, since he couldn’t keep it in his pants, and I want you shoot my wife in her stupid lying mouth.” The assassin agrees, takes back his gun and lines up the shot. He waits… and waits… and waits…

“What the hell is taking you so long!?!? you said you were good at this.”

“Give me a second, I’m about to save you $10,000 dollars.”

submitted by /u/wackoclown
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