Tensions heat up between the U.S and the Soviets. In order to not go the nuclear route, the agree to a dog fight…

The Soviets get right to work, breeding the most savage dog they can and injecting it with steroids, growth hormones, gene therapy- you name it. This goes on for a year until at last they’re convinced they have bred the most vicious dog imaginable. Finally, the big day arrives. The stadium is packed- Soviets on one side, Americans on the other.

At 8:00 sharp the lights go down. The Soviet National Anthem is played as they wheel out their prize canine in a titanium cage. This dog is the ultimate savage- frothing at the mouth, biting at the cage bars. He is something to be feared! Moments later, the U.S. National Anthem is played- and out comes an old guy walking a poodle on a leash. The audience goes deathly quiet as each side takes it in in disbelief!

Suddenly the Soviet dog chews through the steel bars and races toward the poodle. It’s no contest! The Soviet dog leaps- jaws open, ready to tear the poodle limb from limb.

Suddenly- the poodle opens its mouth wide and literally engulfs the bigger dog and swallows it down whole.

Afterwards, the chief Soviet scientist is talking to the American side:

“I … I cannot believe what I just saw! We poured billions of dollars into that dog!”

The American nods-

“We did too… on plastic surgery on an alligator.”

submitted by /u/jseyfer
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