“But… who…?” he asks Merlin.
“Fear not, Arthur – I know how we can protect Guinevere’s chastity in your absence and also discover the identity of her lover. Watch this!”
The magician snapped his fingers and, into thin air, appeared a magical, samite chastity belt with a hole cut through the fabric over the vagina. In the hole of the fabric was an invisible, razor-sharp spring-loaded blade. Merlin grabbed a nearby candle, stuck it into the hole, and SPROING! The blade shot out and chopped the candle clean in half. “Splendid!!!” said Arthur.
Arthur went out on his quest, returned a month later, and lined up all his knights in a row. “Alright, men,” he said, “Show me what you’ve got. Take off your breeches.”
Ashamed, they all took off their breeches and, to Arthur’s astonishment, every single one of his knights was now a eunuch. Gawain, Tristan, Percival — all just had stubs now. All except Galahad. Galahad’s cock remained full and intact.
With tears of gratitude, Arthur approached the young knight. “Ah, Galahad!!! Galahad the Pure!!! Let it be known that you are now the heir to my entire kingdom, to Excalibur, and to all that I have! Tell me, oh brave spirit, how were you able to resist temptation where all others had failed?”
Galahad cleared his throat and said, “Well, it wathn’t eathy…”