Harry: Is there a problem, officer?
Cop: You were going at least 75 in a 55 zone
Harry: No, I was only going 65 tops
Harry’s girlfriend: Oh Harry, you were going at least 80
Harry gives his girlfriend a nasty look
Cop: I’m also writing you a ticket for that broken taillight
Harry: I didn’t even know my taillight was broken
Harry’s girlfriend: Oh Harry, you’ve known about your taillight since we started dating
Harry gives his girlfriend another nasty look
Cop: I’m also writing you a citation for not wearing your seatbelt
Harry: I just unbuckled my seatbelt when you started walking to my car
Harry’s girlfriend: Oh Harry, you never wear your seatbelt
Harry: Bitch, if you don’t shut the fuck up, I swear to God that I’ll smash your stupid face into the concrete?
Cop: Ma’am, does your boyfriend always talk to you like this?
Harry’s girlfriend: Nope, only when he’s drunk