He turns to the altar boy and asks
“where’s that box where I proclaim all the fucked up shit I’ve done lately”
The altar boy, stunned to see the president in his church, directs Trump to the confession box. Trump steps inside and the altar boy realizes the priest is nowhere to be found. To not keep the president waiting, he enters the other side himself.
Immediately Trump begins speaking a flurry of horrible sins.
“This week I grabbed a dozen women by the pussy, stole millions of dollars via fraud and tax evasion, and purposefully escalated the threat of nuclear warfare with North Korea.”
Not knowing how to respond to sins of this magnitude, the altar boy slips out of the box to look for the priest. He finds him coming back from lunch.
“Father, Donald Trump is here and he’s in the confession box spouting some of the most horrible things I’ve ever heard! What do we do?”
“Grab a mop” says the priest.
“Why would we do that” asks the altar boy.
“This happens once a week” says the priest. “Donald’s not confessing he’s just reading his tweets out loud as he writes them”
“Oh” says the altar boy. “So why the mop?”
The priest sighs and says “Donald only tweets on the toilet”.