A leopard is walking through the jungle when he sees a lost dachshund in the distance…

He stealthily begins to stalk up on him, intent on making a meal of him. However, the dachshund catches a glimpse of him out of the corner of his eye. Knowing that there’s no way he can win a footrace against a leopard, he decides to employ other tactics; he sits down by a nearby pile of bones. Once the leopard is in earshot, the dachshund sighs contentedly and says to himself, “My, that was one tasty leopard.” And not being of the brightest variety, the leopard immediately high-tails it out of the area.

A monkey had been watching all this go down, and, being the cheeky rascal of the jungle, decides to spill the beans to the leopard. Swinging through the trees, he eventually catches up to the leopard, and tells him that there’s no way that little dog could have eaten an entire leopard. The leopard sees he’s made a fool of himself, vows revenge, and tells the monkey to hop on his back to come watch.

A few minutes later, the dachshund sees them approaching. As they get closer, he taps his foot in apparent irritation and mutters to himself,

“Where’s that daggum monkey? I sent him off half an hour ago to fetch me another leopard!”

submitted by /u/cross_beaux
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