They are captured by a tribe of natives. The chief says to them, “you must die for intruding our land. But it is our custom to allow you to choose your own death.”
After some time, the Frenchman says, “my great grandfather died by sword while fighting for France, I shall do the same to honor him.”
He takes a sword and impales himself. The natives take him away, skin him, and turn him into a canoe.
The Brit says, “my father gave me his pistol on his deathbed. I shall shoot myself in honor of him.”
The Brit takes the gun and shoots himself. The natives take him away, skin him, and turn him into a canoe.
Awhile later, the American asks for a fork. Confused they give him a fork and he starts stabbing himself all over.
The natives scream out, “what are you doing?!”
The American replies,
“You’re not turning me into a canoe!”