A duck walks into a bar and asks…

“Hello Bartender, might you happen to have any of those delightful crimson seedless grapes?”

“Sorry sir, I know how much you enjoy them. We should have more by tomorrow. We do however have some fresh Kyoho grapes imported from Japan.”

“Ah, I see,” says the duck, crestfallen. “Well at any rate those shall suffice.”

The bartender presents the grapes on an oriental laquerware serving dish. The duck proceeds to peel back the bitter skin and eat the sweet fruit underneath.

Upon finishing his fruits, the duck asks, “Say friend, might you happen to have any nails?”

“Nails? That’s an odd request to a barman. Sorry I’m afraid not.”

“Odd indeed. I only ask because I have some hired help doing some restoration work on my heirloom veranda. They’ve just run out of nails. I just thought I’d ask on the off chance. Well I must be off now to the hardware store, but may I have a parcel of those grapes to go? The help will be parched from working under this hot sun and I suspect they might enjoy some fruit.”

“Yes sir. Here you are.” The bartender hands him the parcel. The bartender then asks, “Would you like the bill sir?”

“Oh Jeffrey you rapscallion,” replies the duck, breaking into a lighthearted chuckle. They share the polite laughter of old acquaintances, as they both well know that the duck has been the owner of the establishment for quite some time since he purchased it from the former owners, who were far less hospitable.

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