and needs some answers to the big questions.
He sets off on a pilgrimage to to meet a famous Zen guru.
After miles of climbing, he arrives at a temple atop a mountain, where the guru’s assistant greets him.
“Welcome,” says the assistant. “The guru is happy to meet you, but you may only ask him one question per lifetime.”
The clickbait journalist thanks him and replies, “Well then I shall be extremely careful with my words, asking only the most direct and important question.”
“That’s wise,” replies the assistant. “Just know that Zen masters are men of few words, and they love to use thought provoking phrases that tease out the truth, rather than giving long explanations.”
“Great,” replies the clickbait journalist. “I use words to make my living, and I know how to ask the right questions.”
He walks into the guru’s room and finds him meditating on a small mat.
“Excuse me, guru, I must know one thing,” starts the clickbait journalist. “What happens after we die?”
The guru opens his eyes, surveys the man, and finally says to him,
“This is a difficult question, but I shall put it in terms that you will understand.”
The clickbait journalist beams and replies, “Go on, then.. I must know what happens in the afterlife!”
The guru flashes him a slight smile and proclaims, “You’ll never guess what happens next.”