St. Peter tells the first one to come up and says, “Alright, Sister, before I let you in: Tell me, have you ever touched a penis?”
The nun is a little nervous, knows better than to lie, and says: “Yes, Peter. Just once, with my pinky.”
Peter says, “Alright,” and lays a bowl of Holy Water down before her. “Just dip your pinky finger in here and you’ll be purified, then we’ll let you in.”
She does, and is let in.
Peter calls up the second nun, and says, “Alright, Sister, same question: Have you ever touched a penis?”
“Well, Peter,” she says, red as a beet, “Father McKenzie made me give him a handjob once– just once!”
“Okay,” Peter says, “Just wash your hands in the Holy Water and we’ll let you in.”
She does and is let in.
Peter is about to call up the third nun, but he notices that the fourth nun behind her is visibly shaken, pale, and really nervous. So he says, “What’s the matter, Sister?”
She gestures to the third nun and says, “Well, if it’s all the same to you Peter, I’d rather gargle that water before she sticks her ass in it.”